I’ve almost always tried to avoid being a beginner. Primarily by not beginning many things at all. I stuck to the subjects, jobs, and even hobbies that came naturally, that I could master quickly. (My GPAs in high school and college looked impressive, but they were propped on intimidating classes not taken, challenging teachers not…
Consulting yourself
When you feel stuck or when you’re faced with a difficult decision (or any decision at all), what do you do? If you’re anything like me, you research and consult: Amazon reviews, books by experts—the more credientialled the better—and people who have experienced something similar. You want to uncover the cold, hard data; the proven…
Resolving to re-focus
Gooooaaaal! That’s how I feel at the beginning of the year—like a victorious fútbol player, all revved up and ready to work hard for another cheer. Goals appeal to my hyperfocus on productivity and achievement. And that’s why I have started avoiding them. At least the traditional New Year’s resolution variety. And by that I…
Bridging questions
Being the Three that I am (more on that here), I’m as wary of my really good days as I am of my really bad ones. Because I know that my extreme highs and lows tend to just be two sides of the same achievement coin. When I talk about really good days, I don’t mean…
The other story
We can all agree that kids tattling on each other is one of the most annoying—and least productive—things they can do, right? I’m more inclined to punish the child tattling than the one being tattled on. The problem with a tattle is that it’s an inherently unreliable story. My daughter will spare no detail about…
I (feel) like it
I was dismissively walking around a nature photography gallery in Jackson Hole one day, when I found myself paused in front of what I would normally consider to be a cheesy image. It combined a cliff, some fog, a lighthouse, and a ray of sun in the cliche arrangement you would expect. And while the…
To feel list
It’s January, nirvana for list makers everywhere. If you’re a Type 3, like me, or another task-oriented type, you probably get a lot of joy from mapping out your year, tweaking your daily schedule, and getting “back on track” after a holiday season of consumption, indulgence, and relaxation. A To Do List channels my motivation,…
Change your instincts
One of the funniest lines in the mockumentary Waiting for Guffman is when the character Sheila says of her husband and acting partner, “He’s teaching me to change my insincts . . . or at least ignore them.” But actually, there can be a lot of power in changing, or at least ignoring, our instincts. Because instincts—fixed…
Messages from yourself
As someone who really values research, empirically proven methods, systems, and other people’s informed opinions, one of the hardest things I’ve had to learn is how to learn from myself. And as it turns out, my self has some pretty crucial stuff to say. Only you and I can know what our own dreams, motivations,…
Writing yourself as a character
It’s one thing to think about new beliefs and values in the abstract, but what do they look like when actually applied in a life? More importantly, what do they look like when applied in your life? Several years ago we were staying abroad for a couple weeks in the home of some family friends. They weren’t…